It was a great morning! The big kids were up in time, no fighting or teasing, and Nora slept while I fixed their breakfasts and packed their lunches. I don’t mean to brag, but I even had the dishwasher running, kitchen all cleaned up, bed made and a load of laundry in the washer before they even walked out the door!! That happens NEVER!!
However, Nora didn’t have the greatest of days today. She had some terribly uncomfortable belly pains that did not seem to want to go away. Nothing at all seemed to console her. The incessant crying turned her poor little nose into a snot-faucet and she was continuing to swallow more and more air. She hasn’t pooped in 4 days now and we were worried that there might be some sort of obstruction. To allay our fears, we set up an appointment with the pediatrician. Nora screamed at the top of her little lungs the whole way there. I clenched my teeth in anger, “How much longer, God??? Do you even hear us?? What are you doing besides making us all, mainly Nora miserable?! Why???!!! What is the point of all of this??” No booming answer, no sudden end to the crying, no grand enlightening. Nothing. Just tears, snot and screaming. Like a child I pouted that I wasn’t getting my way, “I guess we’ll just figure it out ourselves then.” We finally arrived at the pediatrician’s office with mild trepidation and frazzled nerves. It wasn’t until we had Nora out of her car seat and undressed that she suddenly decided things weren’t so bad anymore. By the time the doctor walked in a few minutes later, it was as if we were simply a couple of overreacting parents. For there on the examining table laid a squealy, kicky little baby girl with maybe a few boogies is all. No fever; clean, clear lungs; no bowel obstructions–her belly was nice and soft. Yes, she has a cold, but it is just a cold. Let’s see how it runs its course over the next few days, keep an eye on her temperature and her lungs, but nothing outwardly alarming. It is next to impossible to see into her tiny ear canals. An ear infection hasn’t been ruled out, but there are no obvious indications of one either (pain when swallowing or to the touch, fever).
So back home we went. I sat quietly in the back seat next to Nora feeling like a bit of a jerk. Nora is okay. God most certainly absolutely hears me. God isn’t prone to raising a bunch of spoiled brats. Get rid of my grandiose sense of entitlement already! He is a discerning, judicious Father who is cultivating me into a spiritually mature individual should I so choose to live under His “roof”. My free will allows me to leave at any time! To “figure it out myself” as I so eloquently phrased it earlier. That’s not what I want. I’d be no different than a featherless hatchling lying helplessly beneath my nest. I need God! Oh how I need Him!! I told Him that and apologized for my callowness. Any coincidence that “I’ll Take You Back” was playing on the radio? Like a loving Father He smiled back at me with a sunset, stroked my hair back behind my ear with trios of birds, and embraced me with a song. “Don’t forget that I love you. Don’t for a second forget what you are worth,” He whispered.
You know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.
He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
SO, SO HAPPY THAT NORA DID NOT HAVE A FEVER, OR ANYTHING GOING ON IN HER LUNGS. DON’T FEEL BAD ABOUT GETTING A LITTLE NERVOUS, AFTER ALL WE ARE JUST HUMAN, AND GOD UNDERSTANDS THAT WE ARE HIS CHILDREN. HE WILL NEVER LEAVE US OR LET US STRAY TOO FAR. YOU ARE SUCH A STRONG PERSON, BUT WE ALL BREAK DOWN ONCE IN A WHILE WHEN THINGS ARE GOING ON WITH OUR CHILDREN THAT WE DON’T QUITE UNDERSTAND. YOU ARE THE BEST ALEISA!!!!!! LOVE THE PICTURES TODAY. ESPECIALLY THE ONE OF YOUR AND NORA’S HANDS. THAT ONE IS PRICELESS!!!! NORA IS ONE BEAUTIFUL LITTLE GIRL. ALSO LOVE THE PICTURE OF GAVIN AND NORA, HE IS SUCH A GREAT BIG BROTHER. HOPE YOU ALL ARE GETTING A LOT OF GOOD SLEEP TONIGHT, AND THAT TOMORROW BRINGS NOTHING BUT PEACE AND HAPPINESS. LOVE YOU ALL. TIME FOR ME TO GET SOME SLEEP, SO GUESS I WILL GOING TO BED. GOOD NIGHT AND GOD BLESS.
This happens to us all the time as well. My pediatrician has informed me that there is a magical force field at the front door that instantly cures all children!!! Luckily, she has also reminded me that all of the docs have kids so they know how the force field really works!!!
Good luck with the sickies!! Feel better Nora!
First of all, I needed this reminder that God is just more than you could ever know at this moment. I’m hoping to take this message to heart! Also, I can completely relate to how overwhelming, frustrating, etc. the belly pains are. Our 6-month-old had VERY bad colic the first 4 months of his life–4 or 5 days per week of 8-11 hour crying fits–so I completely empathize. Praying!
You are such an inspiration to me!!! We pray for your family every day.
Thank you for your open heart and words that speak of how you feel. Also for the acceptance of what is happening in your family and their lives. Do not fear that you are being ungrateful at all. God understands and loves us just as we are. My prayers continue for you and for Nora and her tummy. May God be close, near, and dear to you all.
My cousins (the Corey’s) post your updates all the time. I’ve read one of them, and today I read another one. I’m glad I did. I could relate to your feelings of frustration and was encouraged by your witness of God’s love.
My son was incredibly colicky, and I remember taking a ride to the ER with a screaming baby who had been crying for hours and hours. When we got there, he was fine. I learned then that a car ride really helps alleviate some of the stomach distress, so we spent a lot of time in the car after that!! Glad things turned out well!!!
Wow!! This has me in tears! So happy Nora is (relatively) ok. Hope she feels better ASAP!
Aleisa- my third child just turned one and most of the time she’s happy but there are days she’s irritable, crabby, apparently uncomfortable, etc. and I have no idea why. And with the other 2 and working, keeping up around the house, etc., I am exhausted. I can only imagine how you must feel with Nora’s special needs contributing to your exhaustion, stress and worry. It is normal for you to feel the way you do and God (and everyone else) understands. Sending you prayers and hugs!
I did the same thing yesterday, and I am a nurse! Luckily, our pediatrician is also awesome and an understanding mama and although I was for sure my little man had an ear infection, she diagnosed an entirely different issue~ separation anxiety. We all get that way sometimes… maybe it is the divine will of God letting us know that he misses us too and is just waiting for us to turn around to get picked up and cuddled…. who wants to sleep all night outside of his loving arms? Glad Miss Nora only has a little snot.
Yay for God whispers!!! Also yay for the photo of Nora’s hand on yours…I love it!!!! Continued prayers!
Amazing post, Aleisa! ❤