Saturday

I smiled as I looked out the back window. A beautiful cross etched into the morning sky, “Good morning!”

It was indeed a good morning and a good rest of the day. We had a nice visit from William’s Mom who we haven’t seen in a while. Nora and I stayed home while the rest of the family went up to the school playground and then to the store. While Nora napped I got to watching Undercover Boss on TLC. If you’re not familiar with it, it is a reality show that features the CEO or owner of a company who is put to work in his or her company among the “common people” in disguise. It’s entertaining to watch the unsuspecting employees say and do things they never ever would have if they knew the supposed new employee they were training was the CEO!! At the end of each episode it was revealed who the “new employee” really was. The loyal and hard working employees were graciously rewarded for their diligence, others had some explaining to do. I found myself getting choked up at this point. There was something that resonated inside of me as it pertains to Christ. I wondered how many times I’ve been in the position of the unsuspecting employee blatantly saying and doing things in the presence of Jesus and/or His angels in disguise. Beside the glaring moments of my human inequities, I hope there will also be the moments that make God smile — the moments he’ll want to reward me for.

Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.
(Hebrews 13:1-2 NIV)

I love, love, love this song:

“You are looking for a king you will never recognize.”

Also a reminder that I can be Jesus In disguise to others.

Speaking of disguises, how do you like my milk fu manchu?

Nora is doing so much better! Her cold is definitely on its way out of here!

Sunday

The boys went to the Bengal’s game, so Greta, Nora and I had a Girl’s Day In.

We watched movies, ate popcorn, drank milkies and took baffs all day.

Nana and Papa came to visit this evening and brought dinner and desserts. I love my Mom and Dad! It was a perfect way to end the weekend.

He took a little child whom he placed among them. Taking the child in his arms, he said to them, “Whoever welcomes one of these little children in my name welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me does not welcome me but the one who sent me.” (Mark 9:36-37 NIV)

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. (Philippians 4:8 NIV) * I’m going to bed thinking about little baby girl squeals! 🙂

Wednesday

The day started off well until the cat had her 6th seizure that I am aware of. Still no reasons, answers or solutions in sight. Slowly and surely the anxiety took root and began to flourish. It was no longer just the cat that gave me cause for worry. I felt myself slipping, but refused to get knocked down again. Instead of letting something I had no control over seep into other areas of my life and set the tone for the rest of my day I gave it to God. I reminded God (and myself) over and over again that I trust Him. After awhile my fears and misgivings were exposed for what they really were — lies. God’s presence in my life is infallible, guaranteed and infinite.

I think back through all of the years and tears of my life, really up until very recently. I knew of, but didn’t understand the true power of the Holy Spirit. There were so many times, so many instances where I could have stopped, stared up at the sky (as I have a tendency to do) and thanked, praised, surrendered, cried, vented, asked and rested. So many times where this simple, yet efficacious practice could and would have mentally alleviated even the most trivial of complications. However, the news of, “Your baby has trisomy 18, and probably won’t survive delivery, or more than a few days at most” is enough to throw the strongest of giants to the ground. In those moments, I had no choice but to scream out loud for God. There was nothing else, no one else who could help me. After three months of ceaseless prayer, it was no longer theoretical. The reality of God in my life could not, cannot and will not be disputed. What a lesson this has been about prayer, trust and perspective. Even the things that don’t necessarily rip the rug out from under my feet, such as cat seizures, I habitually bring them to God because that’s what I’m used to doing. I can certainly say that Nora has strengthened my prayer life. She has proven its power time and time again. These aren’t just my prayers, but your prayers too.

Unless the Lord  had given me help,
I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death. When I said, “My foot is slipping,”
your unfailing love, Lord , supported me. When anxiety was great within me,
your consolation brought me joy.
(Psalm 94:17-19 NIV)

Oh look! I'm a little Dew Drop!

I made stinkies in the tub again and Mommy didn't realize until the bubbles cleared away!!

Don't tell anyone though!!

Thursday

Thursdays have become my busy day. I was afforded luxury of getting out of the house to go to Bible study and even to help out in Greta’s classroom again. Nora and Nana hung out together for much of the day. (Thank you, Mom!) Bible study was incredible. It is a Beth Moore study on the book of James. The topic today was on joy and anguish. How the two can coexist (story of life since January!?) and even trade places! I love the analogy that was made between mental anguish and childbirth. The abject pain and suffering that is endured through labor with the beautiful precious baby to come. Through our anguish, of whatever it is that we’re going through – there is going to be, there WILL be something amazing as a result. The mere thought of it has tears streaming down my cheeks right now as I type this. My labor with Nora–physical and mental anguish intertwined. Her delivery–that first cry, her little eyes looking back at me, her second cry after we thought we were going to lose her–intoxicating joy. Labor and delivery, a reflection of our life on this earth and a reminder of what is to come. Can you stand it?

A thin package was delivered shortly after I got home from this particularly significant Bible study. It was a book that Melanie had made from the photos of Nora’s birth. Photos of the anguish, photos of the JOY. What a perfect reminder at a perfect moment. I can’t stop looking at it!

To help the sorrowing people of Jerusalem — I will give to them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, and the oil of gladness to replace their sorrow with joy, and clothes of praise to replace their spirit of sadness. Then they will be called flower trees of goodness planted by the Lord to show his splendor.
(Isaiah 61:3-4)

Bible study?? Oh! I thought you said BUBBLE study!

I haven’t had a chance to post in a couple of days with everything going on here. Here are a few pictures of our little swimmer this past Sunday.

Mom?

These things aren't going to fall off me again, are they?

Dat was kind of embarrassing!!

Despite her cold Nora slept wonderfully through the night (Sunday night) and even ate well during the time she woke up. I assumed she was tolerating her cold well and was surprised Monday when she was less than enthusiastic about her milkies. I gave her a couple of baffs to break up the monotony of the day and then settled her down for an afternoon nap.

Oh, I feel seepy.

Awhile after she fell asleep I became concerned about her coloring and hooked her little foot up to the pulsox machine. Her oxygen sats were reading low. Panic mode. I wasn’t sure if the congestion was preventing the flow of oxygen or if her lungs were compromised. I rerouted the oxygen flow through a tube that I placed near her open mouth in the hopes she would regain healthy sats that way. It worked for awhile until she woke up. She was angry, hungry, gassy and pissed – not a easy combo for trying to keep a tiny hose pointed at her angry little mouth. Frustrated and worried we watched as the sats dropped again. Was she just wiggling around too much, which would give false readings? Or were her sats really dropping that low? We had our doctor make “reservations” for us at Children’s and I packed our bags. I’m so thankful for awesome neighbors who rushed down to get the big kids AND fed them dinner while we tried to figure out if we were coming or going – on their anniversary, no less!! However, once we got Nora settled down and some more boogies extracted, the levels were reading steady again, and with the oxygen running back through the nasal cannula. After about 45 minutes of consistent readings we decided not to go to the hospital. My mom agreed to come over and spend the night just in case, but fortunately it never came to that.

Oh! Did I cause some troubles?

Because I’ve not always been diligent about washing my hands AFTER I’ve cared for Nora I now have her cold. I took some cold medicine last night that “may or may not cause drowsiness” hoping that I would at least be able to assist in Nora’s care last night. It rendered me completely useless and I may as well have had a fifth of Jack before I went to bed. (Sorry, sweet hubzbind) I did try to post a blog entry, but obviously that didn’t happen either. (Sorry, sweet readers)

My wonderful, awesome Mom helped get the kids off to school this morning and then did some grocery shopping for me. Later in the morning Nora had her baffies after Daddy got some Johnson & Johnson mentholyptus scented baby wash. We turned on the jets to get some extra mega bubble action. She seemed to like that! That set the tone for a nice long afternoon nap.

So here we are, holding steady and making our way over this exasperating bump in the road. We’ve been advised to keep Nora at home except for doctor visits, and to keep our visitors to a bare minimum, all of which who must have had a flu shot! We do have the RSV vaccination lined up for Nora, so hopefully that will alleviate any worry of that! The big kids have to change clothes when they come home from school and wash their hands and arms. That’s how it has to be until April. While you won’t see the Little Miss out at the grocery store, or at Bible study, I’m so glad I can still share her through the blog. And hopefully April will be here before we know it!

A drawing I found in Greta's school folder. So, so sweeeeeeet!!!!

Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father?
(Hebrews 12:7 NIV)

* I am not being disciplined or punished for something I did wrong. Although I most certainly deserve it, God does not work like that. It is my faith that is being disciplined and perfected through each hardship. It is being molded, shaped and polished to reflect God’s glory.